Jen's Horde

Back in the blogosphere...

2009-10-02T20:29:00.003-06:00

..but not in a good way.

I've pretty much bailed here, as you can probably tell. But, I've been back in the blogosphere for the last couple of weeks on a group blog with my husband and BIL and SIL.

My mother in law had a cerebral aneurysm burst on September 15th, and she's been in the ICU since then. The night she was admitted, she was in a coma and they told us that she would probably not wake up, and if she did it probably wouldn't be a good thing. But, she's been kicking butt and taking names since then, and now there is at least hope for a full recovery.

If you want to see how she's doing, and what I'm up to a lot of days, check over at Linda's Mindful Journey.

For general updates, I'm mostly at Facebook as Jen Lindner-Green, but that's suffering, too. The good news is that LMJ is getting me back in the habit of blogging, and maybe in a few months when things calm down I'll be back over here. I do miss it...

If you're the praying type, do keep Linda in your prayers. Thanks!

Still here

2009-07-30T16:06:00.003-06:00

Two sets of new migraine/fibro meds this summer (one complete fail leading to another to try), and a lot of general goofing off going on.

Somewhere in the process of all this, I seem to have lost most of my "give a damn" and am playing catch up all the time any more.

But, I'm still smilin'! :-D

How are all of you?

Dang!

2009-06-25T17:22:00.000-06:00

Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson all in one week...

Rotting my brain

2009-06-19T16:54:00.003-06:00

We actually got back from our camping trip late last Saturday night. No pictures yet, of course. I'm expecting to get right on that, maybe in December...

Instead of catching you guys up, I've been voraciously reading the gossip sites. I don't know why, I'm just gonna blame the drugs (lots of migraine activity this week.)

I don't recommend any of these, they have bad language and never write about anyone you know, but that doesn't mean I haven't been parked on Dlisted, TMZ, cele|bitchy, and (heaven help us) even a little Perez Hilton all week long.

Because of that, I know way more about Jon & Kate Plus 8 than you do, even though I've never actually seen the show.

I got some bad news when we got back into town, but I want to write it up right, and I just haven't had the brainpower. Plus, I want to tell you all about the trip, too! So, I'll try to get in here again this weekend and bring you all up to speed. Until then, I'm going to go look at the latest embarrassing photos of Britney and spend a little more time trying to figure out who the heck Heidi and Spencer are, and why anyone cares?

Campin'

2009-06-05T10:59:00.002-06:00

We're leaving tomorrow morning to do some camping, we'll be back home in 9 days. Hopefully, I'll get to blog a little from the road, we should have wi-fi available in at least some of our stops...

We figured we'll be going through 5 states, Colorado, Utah, Idaho, Montana and Wyoming. This will be much less driving than our 2007 trip, that really was something. (We went through Colorado, Nebraska, Iowa, Illinois, Indiana, Ohio, Pennsylvania, Missouri and Kansas, if I haven't forgotten anything.)

So, check here, and I hope I'll have posts for you.

Ugh.

2009-05-31T13:12:00.001-06:00

Spending the day on the toilet. Hope I didn't spread this to anyone...

Bob

2009-05-29T13:23:00.001-06:00

No break in sight, but I wanted to share this with you all...

Can't blog

2009-05-23T11:18:00.003-06:00

Family in town.

We did get a minute to go see Terminator Salvation. It was a decent action movie. Meh.

Also, we took a trip to the Wildlife Sanctuary and saw tigers, bears, wolves, a camel and I think they were ostriches? The Sanctuary is not set up like a zoo, where the cages are organized in a way that allows you to get a pretty good look at the animals. They have it set up so the animals are safe and comfortable, but that makes some of them very difficult to see. That's OK, though, they're doing amazing work!

Oh yeah, and we toured Red Rocks a local concert venue and beautiful natural amphitheater. If you're out here, you really should check it out, it's just a fascinating place between the geological significance of the area, and the history of the musicians who've played there.

Well, for being so busy with family, I sure found a lot to blog about!

Back to the 70s!

2009-05-20T00:27:00.004-06:00

These are the shows I used to LOVE when I was 10 and under...

The Hardy Boys-I had such a crush on Shaun Cassidy that I cried myself to sleep one night because I realized that I would never meet him. That's pretty deep, considering I was 6 at the time :-(

Battlestar Galactica-I freaking LOVED this show! I was so sad when it went off the air, then they replaced it with that shameful wreck Galactica 1980. Ugh. The new one was pretty good, but this is the one I grew up with, and I still can't get used to Starbuck being a girl.

The Six Million Dollar Man-I used to make that weird ch-ch-ch-ch sound when I was running, and pretend I was bionic too.

The Tomorrow People-This was a super cheesy British show, but the idea was interesting. The main characters seemed like normal people, until some time in puberty when their powers emerged. Turns out they are the next step in human evolution, and they can read minds and teleport themselves. Fun show!

Star Trek-This was in reruns by the time I got a hold of it, but it was probably the favorite TV of my entire childhood! I so wanted to be on the Enterprise, wearing one of those miniskirt uniforms and kicking butt all over the galaxy. The Prime Directive? Bah! They just did whatever (and in Kirk's case whoever) they wanted.

Here's a guy playing the theme on ukulele. Why? Who knows?

Nose flute? OK!

Apparently people just love the heck out of the Star Trek theme song, because here's yet another version. This time, it's the theremin. It's fairly cringe-worthy, but I applaud her tenacity.

There were a bunch of other shows, but this is enough nostalgia for one day! Plus, I don't want you guys to think I spent my whole childhood in front of the television...

Things you shouldn't have to tell your children.

2009-05-16T22:15:00.002-06:00

Never bet a kid who just farted that he can't fart again. There will be cleanup involved...

This gave me a giggle!

2009-05-15T18:47:00.003-06:00

marriedtothesea.com

This just made me laugh today.

Star Trek

2009-05-12T11:41:00.008-06:00

Some 'Star Trek' gadgets no longer futuristic

Forty years after the original "Star Trek" series was canceled, warp drives and transporter beams remain more science fiction than fact.

But some of Star Trek's 23rd century gadgets, such as handheld medical scanners, language translators and high-tech weaponry are becoming a reality in the 21st century.

For one thing, almost every moviegoer attending the latest Star Trek film that opened in theaters last week must remember to turn off their communicators - better known as cell phones.

I have to admit that my Treo does make me feel pretty darn space age...

We all went to see the new Star Trek movie this weekend, and we thought it was great! No complaints.

Also, did you see this great clip of Chris Pine, Zachary Quinto and Leonard Nimoy on Saturday Night Live? Update Feature: Star Trek Hee hee!

Reminds me a little of this, of course. (It cuts off a little early, but it's the best copy I could find. If there's a better one out there, let me know and I'll fix it.)

I always do what Captain Kirk tells me, so I'm signing off in an attempt to get a life. Live long and prosper...

Not Mexican Independence Day

2009-05-05T10:40:00.003-06:00

Did you know that Cinco de Mayo (which is today) is not Mexican Independence Day? I always thought that it is.

According to Wikipedia:

Cinco de Mayo (Spanish for "fifth of May") is a regional holiday in Mexico, primarily celebrated in the state of Puebla, with some limited recognition in other parts of Mexico. The holiday commemorates the Mexican army's unlikely defeat of French forces at the Battle of Puebla on May 5, 1862, under the leadership of Mexican General Ignacio Zaragoza Seguín.

The outnumbered Mexicans defeated a much better-equipped French army that had known no defeat for almost 50 years. However, Cinco de Mayo is not "an obligatory federal holiday" in Mexico, but rather a holiday that can be observed voluntarily.

While Cinco de Mayo has limited significance nationwide in Mexico, the date is observed in the United States and other locations around the world as a celebration of Mexican heritage and pride. However, a common misconception in the United States is that Cinco de Mayo is Mexico's Independence Day, which actually is September 16 (dieciséis de septiembre in Spanish), the most important national patriotic holiday in Mexico.

So there you have it, if you needed a small Mexican history lesson today, you can go ahead and check that off.

I freaking hate sinuses.

2009-05-04T18:24:00.000-06:00

That's all. Carry on.

Which would you pick?

2009-05-01T22:46:00.002-06:00

Flu Masks in Fashion as Virus Nears Pandemic Stage

If you don't want it, flaunt it.

As swine flu approaches the pandemic stage, a new fad is going viral: the swine flu fashion mask.

Graphic designers and online retailers are offering swinophobes everywhere the chance to make a fashion statement - even as they ward off the deadly bug.

I would pick the skeleton. What would you want?

From Bad to Worse

2009-04-30T22:19:00.001-06:00

Well, the good news is that I got yesterday's song out of my head.

The bad news is that this is what replaced it:

I'm afraid for tomorrow...

I'm a ding dong all right...

2009-04-29T23:28:00.005-06:00

I don't know why, but I've had the Christmas song "Ding Dong Merrily on High" stuck in my head ALL DAY!

In case you're not familiar with it, here's a pretty standard arrangement.

And a bell choir:

The same song on that ginormous organ in the Tabernacle in Salt Lake City:

A somewhat hilarious, somewhat horrific version featuring French and Saunders:

This one's on the banjo, cause, well, why not?

There, I hope it's good and stuck in your head now, too!

Leftover cat

2009-04-28T18:41:00.003-06:00

Sorry I've been away so long. It was a busy weekend and then we had co-op signups, and I just didn't have a lot of time.

OK, maybe this video isn't that funny, but it hit me just right because I was actually trying to do this with the shed fur of a Norwegian Elkhound who visited us the other day. I made about 6" of yarn by hand, just as a proof of concept, then gave up because it was labor intensive.

I was all ready to say how I think it's weird, but then I remembered that we have a jar full of cat fur that my kids harvested from our soon-to-be-put-down kitty. So, since I know *we're* not weird at all, this must be OK. Just nod politely.

So thin!

2009-04-23T19:24:00.004-06:00

Miss Universe Australia in "skinny" controversy

Australia's Miss Universe contest was thrown into controversy on Thursday with doctors and dieticians complaining a leading finalist was "skin and bones" and dangerously malnourished.

Sydney model Stephanie Naumoska, 19, was one of 32 contestants from more than 7,000 hopefuls to make the glittering final at an event promoting "healthy, proportioned, bodies."

I am wondering how they didn't notice this when they were culling her out of the over 7,000 hopefuls?

One of the doctors interviewed believes that they should impose a BMI cutoff of 20 on their contestants (hers is 15.1, the cutoff for malnutrition is 18). I wish they would do this for modeling, too.

I'm donating platelets later this week, while I'm there I'll see if I can donate some adipose tissue for the needy as well. I'll let you know how it goes...

Columbine, 10 years later

2009-04-20T11:51:00.001-06:00

10 years later, the real story behind Columbine

They weren't goths or loners.

The two teenagers who killed 13 people and themselves at suburban Denver's Columbine High School 10 years ago next week weren't in the "Trenchcoat Mafia," disaffected videogamers who wore cowboy dusters. The killings ignited a national debate over bullying, but the record now shows Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold hadn't been bullied - in fact, they had bragged in diaries about picking on freshmen and "fags."

Over the years, a lot of people have asked me if I homeschool because of the attack at Columbine, and other school shootings. The answer is not that simple. We'd been considering homeschooling since before we even had any kids, but I have to admit that this event was a factor in our decision.

When Columbine happened, Anya was 4 and Maya and Sage were 2. I watched the news all through the day, just not believing. This was happening right here in town, in a "good" school, in the district both Davin and I had graduated from.

(To make things weirder, I'd also attended the middle school right next door to Platte Canyon High School, so I turned on the TV not long ago and saw another school related to me being evacuated.)

Of all the horrible things that happened the day of the Columbine shootings, the one that pierced me the most was seeing all the parents waiting outside the school looking for their child throughout the day. The police were releasing the kids in waves, and as each group came out there would be a spate of happy reunions, then those parents would scoop up their kids and leave. Everyone else would wait for the next wave, hoping.

Late in the day, they said that no more kids would be coming out. All of the parents still standing outside KNEW there was no hope, and that there was nothing left to do but go home. Without their children.

That was the thought that nearly killed me. I couldn't imagine how it must feel to know your baby was not only dead, but had died afraid and confused, and you couldn't be there even after the fact.

As I said, I had already been thinking about homeschooling by then; Columbine merely helped me make up my mind.

I know that school shootings are mercifully rare. Besides, people get mowed down at McDonald's, which puts my family in grave danger (if the food doesn't kill us first!) My kids could be involved in a violent encounter anywhere, it doesn't have to be in a school.

But, I think that since I'm with my kids a far larger percentage of the time than if they were in school, we'd most likely face any danger together. Davin and I wouldn't be with those scared, hurting parents standing outside the building, wondering if our kids were coming out or not. That, among a million other blessings, make all the sacrifices involved with homeschooling worth it for me.

Cabin Fever

2009-04-18T12:40:00.003-06:00

We are snowed in. There is somewhere between 18" and 2' on the ground, and that's deceptive because it's wet snow and it's compacting as it lands.

We were supposed to having friends over for dinner last night, but there was no way they could come because of the roads. Today we're supposed to get out and see some other friends, but the snow's coming down so hard that we almost can't see the neighbors' houses. And we live in a cookie cutter suburban neighborhood, so we're not talking Little House on the Prairie-type distances here!

We have food, and the power's on, so it's all good survival-wise. But DANG it's boring! I'm starting to get a little twitchy.

We're supposed to get a break late this afternoon or tonight. That's a good thing, because I'm just about at this point:

Maybe I'll work on that novel I've been meaning to write.

All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl. All work and no play makes Jen a dull girl.

Easter!

2009-04-11T10:31:00.002-06:00

I was searching all over the internet this morning for a representation of either the empty tomb, or of the Christ rising from the tomb for an Easter post. There are a LOT of images out there to choose from!

This one struck me because this Jesus really looks he's been dead for 3 days. Not to mention the crucifixion before that, which must really take the wind out of guy's sails. This guy looks like he's been through the ringer!

Most of the risen Christs look pretty refreshed, like 3 days underground does a body good. I really think Jesus was probably more like this at first.

I found this over at Bible Paintings. Here is their commentary on this painting:

Date: 1490

Artist: Bramantino

Comment: The Resurrected Christ
Bramantino (circa 1465-1535) was a Lombard painter and architect whose real name was Bartolomeo Suardi. His works were noted for their fine architectural backgrounds - though there is little evidence of this in 'The Resurrected Christ'. If anything, it is the face, body and cloak that have an architectural quality, evidence of careful draughtsmanship.

It seems to me that Bramantino was trying to capture the image of a perfect man - perfect in form, in intellect, and in compassion.
At the same time, his 'Resurrected Christ' is a man who has passed through death and is now detached, no longer part of the world that we, the Living, inhabit.

The cloak that Jesus wraps around himself has an almost metallic sheen to it, mirroring the pallor of the skin. And yet when you look at the painting, you notice that the face itself has quite a different color to it, as if there is more life in it than there is in the body.

The skin is luminously pale, unearthly, even though it shows the marks of violence and the raised veins of a living body. The eyes are sad, looking through and past the viewer. They are the eyes of someone who is somewhere else. These eyes have seen things the Living have not seen. They are disquieting, perhaps because they make the viewer seem irrelevant.

Happy Easter, everyone! I'll see you next week.

Warning

2009-04-09T15:56:00.001-06:00

I'm crabby and moving slloooowwwwwly this week, thanks to the fibro/migraine double whammy. I'm trying to keep away from civilized folk, on account of I want to keep my friends.

Taking drugs and going back to bed...

Duh!

2009-04-06T12:16:00.001-06:00

I was getting a new service hooked up recently, and for the online portion I had to give an answer for a security question, in case I forget my password.

The question the guy asked was, "Who is your favorite author?" Immediately I said "Stephen King." He high-fived me and said that was his favorite author, too! (He was an awfully cool guy the whole time, but this sealed his coolness for me.)

We finished up the transaction and I headed out. I was telling a friend later that day about this cool guy Davin and I had met, and some of the funny things he'd said and how his favorite author was Stephen King, too. Then I realized, well duh! Stephen King is a tremendously popular author, probably a HUGE number of people would answer that. So, it's probably not the best security question for me to choose, since just by playing the statistics people would be likely to guess my answer.

And then, if the person trying to hack my account actually knew me, which would make it much easier for them to know stuff like my full name and address, it would be a complete no-brainer! I might as well take out billboards and full page ads in the paper offering up my social security number, and all my vital statistics.

So now, I need to call them back and either pick a different security question, or change my author to someone no one would guess but that I'd remember if I needed to. Any suggestions?

So, I was thinking...

2009-04-03T11:32:00.007-06:00

You know how I had that horrible gum graft here recently?

That was a vile and unpleasant experience. And, to make it worse, for only a little more money I probably could have just had my whole body rebuilt to make me better, stronger, faster. It seems redundant that I should be in such pain *AND* have to pay a whole bunch of money, too.

So, I was thinking. I should search the fetish sites online and find a dentist who is also a sadist, and maybe we can work out a deal. We can exchange services! He can fix my gums, and I will let him hurt me for free. It's a win/win situation, right?

I know, you're thinking that any dentist could be a sadist and used to hurting people plus getting paid handsomely to do it. I mean, how can you know how much your dentist is enjoying the procedure? Maybe that's why he became a dentist?

So, to make it worth his while, too, I'd be willing to go the extra mile. Instead of keeping myself under control the whole time, I'll just scream and yell and cry, which is what I want to do at the dentist's anyway. I'm such a wienie! I'd even be willing to let him use some creepy old dental tools on me, if they're clean.

But if he gets something like this out, I'm outta there. I do have some standards...

You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows...

2009-03-31T13:17:00.002-06:00

This song is stuck in my head today, so I thought I'd dig out this video for you guys. Look how young he is! I don't know why, but this song always makes me happy.

Someone's been studying anatomy too much...

2009-03-27T15:50:00.002-06:00

A conversation from Walgreen's yesterday:

Anya: Mom, that sign says they sell facial tissues here.

Me: Yeah, it's a drug store, they sell all kinds of stuff.

Anya: Really? Like muscles and skin and stuff?

Me: ...few seconds of silence... Not that kind of tissues, they mean Kleenex!

I'd say we have the sciences well under control here!

It BETTER snow tomorrow!

2009-03-25T16:46:00.005-06:00

We haven't had nearly enough snow this year, and when that happens the whole state is on fire all summer. The forecast is now saying 8-15" for the metro area, how much do you suppose we'll actually get?

I'm holding out for a LOT. Remember this amazing blizzard from 2006? That was great! We need more like that.

If any of you have any pull, send us some extra snow! We'll thank you now, and we'll be thanking again you this summer when we can roast our marshmallows while camping!

Can't blog

2009-03-24T15:38:00.000-06:00

Life is just too boring today. I even cleaned bathrooms that didn't need it, just to have something to do.

I'm off to clean out the fridge. I hope your day is more interesting.

Trip to the Coroner's Office

2009-03-20T13:02:00.003-06:00

The other day, Lori commented, wondering where Anya got her Wednesday-ish tendencies from. Really, I swear it wasn't all from me! A lot of what we do and study is because she and the other kids are interested, not because I'm leading them that way. But, I'm pretty open with helping them get where they want to go, and it doesn't hurt that I'm fascinated by true crime, etc, so I can generally answer their questions and find resources for them.

I didn't plan it this way, but the post the other day became and excellent segueway for this one! Yesterday was our homeschool group's trip to tour the County Coroner's office. It was amazingly cool! They were very good about answering the kids' questions respectfully without getting too scary or gross, but also without dumbing anything down.

They made sure we could come at a time when they weren't busy, and everything was all cleaned up. So, we didn't see any bodies; everyone was put away when we came through. We learned about what you need to learn to work there, and what happens when they get a call. We got to see the evidence room, and learned how long they keep stuff; 1 year for "naturals," 2 years for accidental and suicides, and they keep evidence from homicides forever.

We also got a new term that we hadn't heard before! Yay, vocabulary! And, because I love you all so much, I will share it with you.

Diener-From wikipedia-"The word Diener is German for servant. In English, it is generally used to describe the person, in the morgue, responsible for handling, moving, and cleaning the corpse (though, at some institutions dieners perform the entire dissection at autopsy). It is derived from the German word Leichendiener, which literally means corpse servant."

There you go, aren't you glad you stopped by today?

If this seems at all interesting to you, you should check with your county. Or, come visit me and I'll set you up! This was, hands down, one of the most interesting tours we've ever been on.

Wednesday

2009-03-18T11:14:00.007-06:00

When Anya was little, among other things, we used to call her "Wednesday," after the creepy little girl on the Addams Family. Anya never had a regular lovie like her sisters (you can see Sage's Meowie here.) Instead, she carried around a rubber human skeleton as if it were her baby. For her 3rd birthday, she insisted on a skeleton costume, which I had to make because I couldn't find one in her size. She helped me to make it anatomically correct, because one of her pastimes was to drag out our ancient copy of Gray's Anatomy and make us read it to her. She really was an odd little kid.

She's still fairly Wendesday-ish, although as she gets older she can "pass" for normal more easily. But, if you ever want to be assured that she's still creepy on the inside, just ask her about anything dealing with death, including the processes of decomposition and how to identify human remains. That's been her latest passion.

I'm going to go hang with my Wednesday girl and the rest of the horde. Happy Wednesday, everyone!

17th Anniversary!

2009-03-13T14:44:00.005-06:00

Tomorrow is our 17th Anniversary! It's the first prime number anniversary we've had since 2005. Woohoo, that's got to count for something!

There are no "traditional" anniversary gifts between 15 and 20 years. I guess after 15 years of wedded bliss we're supposed to stop getting excited each year, and start just living in 5 year blocks? Not that we've ever paid attention to the suggested gift ideas, I still feel entitled to them and it's like we've been robbed.

Thankfully, there are still "modern" and "travel" anniversary gifts for this year that we can ignore. (They are "furniture" and "North Carolina" respectively.)

Anyway, as always, I'm glad and grateful to be married to Davin. He's a wonderful man, an amazing dad and my best friend in the whole world. I love you, Davin!

You know you're living with a 7 year old boy...

2009-03-12T21:27:00.002-06:00

when the only way you can persuade him to eat his broccoli is by singing the praises of the hideous stink he will produce later if he does.

Lost Weekend

2009-03-09T18:43:00.003-06:00

While there were plenty of drugs, they weren't the "good kind" and this wasn't quite the party mayhem you'd expect of a lost weekend. I had a frakking migraine that just wouldn't die, all weekend long!

It started last Friday, and I didn't feel somewhat human again until this morning.

When this happens, I get very afraid. A few years ago, I ended up in a situation where I living a pretty non-stop migraine. It ended up being partially due to the medications my neuro at the time was throwing at me to treat them, which resulted in a pretty ugly 6 week cold turkey period that I'd really rather never do again. >shudder< Sending a special thanks out to everyone who put up with me during that period, because I was not a happy camper...

Today, I started searching for reasons why I'd had such a long, horrible attack this time. I started to wonder if I had a sinus infection. About this time two years ago, I had a sinus infection that I was completely unaware of. My neuro told me that could have been causing some migraine issues at the time, so I thought it could well be happening again.

So today, even though it's hard to describe head pain to a doc when your head hurts all the time, the appointment went well. The doc was pretty patient, and a peek into all the orifices in my head told him I was indeed suffering from a sinus infection.

Yay me! I know it sounds silly to cheer, but I'm so glad it's something that isn't chronic and can be fixed pretty readily. I got 'scrips for 2 meds and an OTC nose spray, and I'm feeling pretty glad about the whole thing.

I wish I had more to report from this amazing lost weekend, but I'm sure you can fill it all in for yourself. Imagine me, the tragic heroine, in my beautiful housecoat and perfect hair and makeup, lying stoically in the semi-darkness while my friends and family speak in hushed tones about how brave I was being, and what an inspiration I am to everyone who meets me, and you'll be just about right. Well, maybe 50% right. Or less. OK, add in some whining and curse words...oh and don't forget the lank, smelly hair (no way I'm scrubbing my head when it already hurts!) and you're probably much closer to what really happened.

When they make the movie of my life, I'd like it be more like the first description, OK? Jennifer Connelly could play me, and in between takes she could tell me all about how cool it was to work with David Bowie in Labyrinth, that might make this whole ordeal worthwhile. Well, not really, but it wouldn't hurt!

Happy Monday.

Watchmen

2009-03-06T11:01:00.002-07:00

Did anyone go see Watchmen at midnight when it opened last night?

I'm trying to read the graphic novel, and then decide if I'm going to see it. So far, it's pretty interesting, and it's keeping my attention. I keep thinking that The Incredibles has some 'splaining to do, though. What with the government shutting the superheroes down, and now someone's killing "supers." It's just an errant thought from a few chapters in...

It's HARD to read a graphic novel! Does anyone else have this problem? It's a rocky process, because I have to deliberately slow myself down. My eyes want to skip ahead to read the words, but I find I'm missing whole chunks of storyline this way. So, I flip back a lot. I remember reading comic books as a kid, so apparently I've lost this skill somewhere along the way.

Sorry for such a bumpy post, I woke up with a migraine. I wanted to post because it's been a while, but I'm just not really up to fixing all my errors. If you catch something, let me know in the comments and I'll fix it.

Kweeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

2009-03-03T20:16:00.003-07:00

Created by Train Horns

Woohoo, I could hear it! After all that loud partying in college, then all the years of ignoring, "Wah, she's touching me!" and "Are we there yet?" I thought for sure my hearing was wrecked.

I wonder how that could be? Oh well, I'm just glad there's still some part of me that's behaving as if it were 25!

Pining

2009-03-02T12:57:00.003-07:00

Not for the fjords, though.

I'm pining for a Kindle 2, the wireless reading device from Amazon. It can hold over 1,500 books, get magazine issues automatically as they come out, the charge lasts for days, and you can download a new book wirelessly from just about anywhere. No more finishing up a book at the doctor's office and being subjected to hours of those parenting magazines aimed at toddler moms!

The only problem is that it's mighty expensive considering my regular book budget doesn't normally even include brand new hardbacks (unless it's Stephen King, of course.) Knowing me, this seems like one of those things that once I have it in my hand I will wonder how I ever lived without it. But, right now I'm living without it just fine, so I should probably just leave it alone.

But it's thinner than a pencil and weighs less than a can of soda. I waaaaaannnnnnnt one!

I figure I'll save any gift money I get for this. By the time I can afford it, there may even be another generation. And, but then it will be more obvious if this is technology that's here to stay. Whenever anything new like this comes out, somewhere in the back of my mind I hear a menacing voice whisper, "Betamax."

I'll update you guys as I get closer...

Why are Goldfish Crackers so darn good?

2009-02-27T17:33:00.007-07:00

I read the ingredient list carefully, and it doesn't say anything about heroin, meth *or* crack cocaine. Unless "monocalcium phosphate" is slang for that stuff now. Kids these days, I'm not hep to their jive any more...

Seriously, I think I need to put the crackers down and actually drive away from my house to stop eating them!

Is there some sort of 12 Step program I can join to get the Goldfish monkey off my back? Maybe one with 24 steps, so I can curb my Twilight habit, too?

Just call me Bubba.

2009-02-25T17:46:00.005-07:00

Do remember this exchange from the movie Forrest Gump?

Lt. Dan: What's wrong with your lips?

Bubba: I was born with big gums, sir.

Lt. Dan: Yeah, well, you better tuck that in. Gonna get that caught on a trip wire.

After last month's gum graft, I'm feeling a lot like Private Bubba Blue. No one warned me that I would end up with a freaky-big chunk of gum tissue in front of my lower front teeth. I'd hoped this would be a temporary situation, and maybe the extra slab they sewed on would fall off having done its job. Unfortunately, the periodontist assures me that this is not just normal but is actually one of the better outcomes.

I asked if we could fix it, and he cringed (probably remembering what a baby I was about the original surgery) and told me that my only option is another procedure. Yeah, no thanks. He did promise to call me if someone develops a painless shrink ray, until then I'll just stick to tucking my lip in...

That's it! I give up!

2009-02-23T21:32:00.008-07:00

My laptop is dead again. It's on its way back to HP to get fixed again. I'm reduced to using the crappy desk top from back in the day. Again.

Grrr, technology is vexing me! I'm just going to take my family and go live in a cave. If you need me, send smoke signals.

To add to the fun, I have two dental appointments this week. One is my regular checkup, and I've learned the hard way not to skip those! (At least not for six years straight.) The other is the periodontist following my gum graft. Don't you wish you were me? Yeah, everyone does.

On a happy note, I'm going with a friend to see Twilight tomorrow night. Guess how many times this will be? I really probably need help...

De-stashing

2009-02-21T00:07:00.005-07:00

I mean that I'm getting rid of a lot of yarn, but the subject of this post reminds me that I need to wax, too. All that time in high school when I couldn't wait to grow out of my acne, I wish someone would have told me that even more horrifying skin issues would crop up over time. Then I wouldn't have been in such a hurry!

Back to the yarn. I had no idea I had so much of it crammed upstairs in my stash corner. And, now I need to condense it and move it so that I can fit the desk we're getting from Heather in that same spot.

Most of the yarn wasn't really expensive, and I didn't buy it with the idea of making anything specific with it. I just can't seem to NOT buy yarn if I see it's available, and heaven help us all if it's on sale!

I think that I need to declare a moratorium on yarn shopping, and go cold turkey until I use up some of what I have. And, in the meantime, I'll make more squares for LoveAfghans for Pine Ridge Reservation. I haven't sent her a box of them in ages, and she makes such pretty blankets that it would be nice to get involved again. Maybe I'll even start this before I finish up my Crayola-inspired socks.

Does anyone want a ton of acrylic yarn in odd amounts? Let me know, I can hook a sister (or brother) up...

Hey Bryan and Baxter!

2009-02-19T20:16:00.014-07:00

Wow! Turns out those guys we went to see last night from the Rocky Mountain Paranormal Society aren't just paranormal researchers, they're genuine psychics as well!

Or, at least I thought they were for a little bit there, when they were telling me all about my yarn projects, and my dental work, and they knew all of my kids by name... That's about the closest I've ever come to actually crapping my pants in public (not that I crap them in private...much...moving on!)

In an effort to show everyone in the audience how rampant fraud is, and how easy it could be to fool someone, they told us they were doing to do a "cold reading." They did a pretty fabulous reading last night, they picked my family out of the crowd, talked about my knitting projects, and my dental work and until Baxter named the the "Crazy Hot" yarn I'm using on my latest sock project, I really had no idea how they were doing it! Then it hit me, duh, I was just blogging about that today! And the floodgates of understanding opened about as widely as they ever do for me.

While I normally don't ever tell on my blog where I'm going to be at any specific time, as you can see I did yesterday. I didn't give enough information, *I thought*, for someone to figure out exactly where I'd be, but I was wrong. It was enough that the guys could search for anyone who posted that they'd be there, find my blog, memorize some stuff about us, and give a very authentic sounding reading. That'll learn me!

We all learned to be more skeptical of these readings we see, and I learned not to be so darn transparent on my blog!

I'm just glad I haven't blogged anything too embarrassing lately! Once I recognized where the information was coming from, my brain started shorting out because I was trying to remember what I posted lately. "Did I talk about overdrawing the checking account? Being constipated? That weird rash? Think, woman!" This is one of the times I'm grateful that I haven't been posting as much as I used to. Whew!

It was a very worthwhile presentation, we all had a blast! They showed some "ghost photos" and explained why they were not real. But, they also shared some photos, video and sound recordings that couldn't be explained (ooh, spooky!) And, they dished the dirt on the dirt under our old favorite, the Stanley Hotel. There was a ton of other stuff, too, I ended up wishing I'd taken notes.

Also, they gave a painless explanation of the scientific method as it relates to their work; how they can have problems recreating their results, etc. So, heck, it counts as school, too! Can't beat that!

There are still a few more dates on the library's calendar if anyone wants to check them out. You can find that all here. I recommend it, it was a most welcome diversion, and gave us all a lot to think about. ETA: Just don't blog about it first unless you want a whole lot of attention...

Thanks, Bryan and Baxter and everyone from the Rocky Mountain Paranormal Society, that was great!

Well then...

2009-02-18T11:53:00.004-07:00

Things went poorly with the friend I mentioned the other day. I don't want to say too much, because it's not my story to tell, but I do feel that everyone who was involved in trying to help her did their best. It's out of our hands now.

I'm spending today around the house, trying to get stuff ready for a new project I'm working on, and doing some self-comforting things; sock knitting, reading to my kids. It's all good. Well, except I'm a little weirded out by the way the socks are turning out. I picked the yarn because it was fun with bright colors, but it's turning out to look like it represents a box of crayons. You can see the yarn here, it's the one called "Crazy Hot."

Ooh, and the girls and I are going tonight to listen to speakers from the Rocky Mountain Paranormal Research Society. Maya and Sage especially are really interested in this sort of thing, and I've always thought it was fascinating, so it should be a welcome distraction. And, it dovetails nicely with our trip to the Stanley Hotel earlier this month (pictures are coming!)

It's a beautiful day out there, and we're just going to enjoy it all :-)

Still here!

2009-02-16T22:01:00.004-07:00

Sorry, I've been here but not really HERE. I know. I've missed you, too.

My computer died, and that took a lot of my computer time away, because I needed to share the rickety old last-millennium desktop with the kids. That just about sucks all the joy out of surfing. My lovely laptop is back now, and my online life is getting back to normal.

This last week, I've watched a close friend hit some problems. Many people are trying to help her, but I'm coming to terms with the idea that she doesn't necessarily want to get better, and any effort we put in is essentially wasted at this point. How do you know when to stop trying to take care of someone who's unwilling to take care of herself?

Take care of your gums, kiddos...

2009-01-28T20:08:00.004-07:00

...because I had a gum graft today, and I tell you that I'd rather have given birth. I thought THAT was a bad place to get stitches, but that was before I had these. New winner!

And, it's disgusting to boot, it just keeps oozing and oozing blood everywhere, which would be fine if I didn't have to taste it. I have no idea how vampires can stand this.

So, if you want to come look at the injuries (the stitched up area, or the top of my mouth where they took the tissue from) you MUST bring me a milkshake, and do your best to score me some narcotics. Otherwise just stay away, because I'm mighty grumpy.

>:-| I can't even frown, I just have to make a straight face with angry eyebrows.

Gotta run, need to spit...

I wonder...

2009-01-26T05:25:00.004-07:00

When a person dies violently in a book or movie, they always describe him as "lying in a pool of blood."

Why a pool? Why not a "blood puddle?" Or, if it's been a while, why not say, "he was lying in a scab of blood..."

Just a random thing from my head.

I'll be watching for the lady in room 217!

2009-01-23T14:56:00.007-07:00

Since the trip to the County Coroner's Office is filling up nicely, I thought I'd see if anyone in the homeschool group is interested in taking the Ghost Tour at the Stanley Hotel in Estes Park. I booked it for our co-op, we go next month!

Those of you who are big fans of Stephen King will recognize this as the inspiration for his 1979 novel The Shining. Wikipedia has a pretty good section on how The Stanley became The Overlook in the novel, for anyone who's interested.

Maya and Sage, my 11 year olds, are the most excited about this. Well, besides me I mean :-) They've wanted to tour The Stanley since they saw it on Ghost Hunters a while back. (There are some awesomely creepy videos of their experiences here, squee!)

I'm doing this as part of the co-op, since it's really for the older kids. Speaking of co-op, we're all posting classes now, and so far we're over 55 and they're still coming in! The all time high was 70+ classes in 3 months! (For a desription of how our co-op works, you can click here.)

It's just so amazingly cool that the kids in the homeschool group are getting older, and we can do some of this neat stuff with them. When we started the group in 2002, the oldest kid available was 7. Now we've got a pretty decent DDC (Double Digits Club) within the group, and we regularly see kids from birth to around 16 at our events. I love my homeschooling families :-D

Happy Friday!

Win a copy of Knitting for Peace!

2009-01-22T14:27:00.002-07:00

Kala, over at Vegan Craftastic, is running a contest to win a copy of the book Knitting for Peace: Make the World a Better Place One Stitch at a Time.

I love to craft for charity, and this looks like a really neat resource. Check it out!

Sage's Stitches are OUT!!!!

2009-01-20T12:01:00.004-07:00

It's been 2 weeks since her surgery, and today the stitches came out.

Because they had to go so deep to remove all of the affected tissue, she's got about a zillion stitches inside, but those will dissolve and we don't need to worry about them. Today they just took out the ones on the surface.

They said she's looking good, and that she'll still probably be worn out sometimes because of how the procedure went, but that just having the stitches out should make her feel better. Whew!

Yesterday, I took her and some other tweens out to see Twilight. Yeah, again. Actually, I saw it once in the interim without telling you guys, so this was the 7th time. Yes, I understand that I have a problem... What of it?

Anyway, yesterday was the first time she was able to get a shower and go out and do stuff for any length of time. Yay for Sage! So, I think she's starting to really recover, either that or the Twilight movie has some magical healing powers. Given the migraine I ended up with yesterday, I'm pretty sure it's the former, or maybe it just doesn't work for old people?

Either way, I'm glad to see her up and about more!

Delegate!

2009-01-16T14:51:00.003-07:00

Guess who vacuumed my house today?

My seven year old son!

He's a good-hearted kid, and eager to please, but normally I don't give him a lot of responsibility. He has a freakishly short attention span...unless he's involved in some form of demolition. Therefore, whatever task I set him to may start well, but it ends in an explosion and a giant mess. And tears, often from me.

But, today, I got to thinking about it. He likes machines. The vacuum cleaner is a machine. He likes things with wheels, the vacuum cleaner has wheels! When you think about it, it's basically a power tool, right?

It was AWESOME! He vacuumed the heck out of my carpet (and trust me, there was a lot of heck in there to suck out!) He was having such a great time that he didn't want it to end! I think he's in love...

Wait until I show him the hose and the attachments, I may have to buy him his own. That's OK, it's worth it!

Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa....

2009-01-14T18:01:00.006-07:00

During a conversation I had with my Dad the other day, he expressed his disappointment that I haven't been blogging much. There was nothing I could do but hang my head in shame and promise to do better.

Part of the problem is that I have been goofing off way too much on Facebook (I'm Jen Lindner-Green if you want to "friend" me.) It's very different from blogging, but I get more feedback there and I keep hooking up with old friends so I just sort of gravitated off in that direction. I am ever so sorry. You guys deserve better. Do you still love me?

Another part of the problem is that Sage finally had that precancerous birthmark removed in a surgery that turned into a big gory mess (but I got to watch the procedure, which was most excellent!) The recovery has been a lot more stressful than it would normally be. The bad news: They expect a great deal of bleeding during scalp surgery, and while we like to see Sage exceed all expectations, we don't mean stuff like this. It really was pretty awful. The good news: She is 100% cancer free, and this surgery shouldn't need to be repeated. So, as soon as we get her healed up, she's done, duh duh done (think "Dragnet" for the tune to that) with this whole experience.

Other than that, all is good! Homeschooling is ripping right along, and we get to go to the County Coroner's Office in March. We were supposed to go last year, but we were still suffering from the Iowa Death Flu. So, YAY, we're taking the kids to the morgue (temporarily)!

Oh, yeah, and Twilight has taken over our lives. We loves us some Twilight. We are planning to move to Forks and buy a house next door to the Cullens. So, the stalking has taken up a bit of time, not to mention trying to hide from the Volturri and the werewolves...

Seriously, between taking different groups of kids, etc, I've seen the movie 5 times in the theater. Me, the grownup! I was thinking hard the other day, trying to remember the last time I'd seen a movie more than once or twice in the actual theater... Not counting movies I've watched while only wearing a bra and slip, can you guess what the last movie was that I saw 5 times in the theater? Click here for the answer! Were you right? Let me know in the comments.

Anyhoo, I'm here. I will be here more often, because it breaks my heart to disappoint my Dad. I love you, Dad!

Updates all around...

2008-11-25T12:37:00.003-07:00

I'm back home now! I rolled in on the train Monday morning, and pretty much slept through yesterday.

The train between here and Iowa runs overnight, so I didn't really get to see any scenery. But, I did see one notable thing while I was riding. There was an older guy in my car, who was on oxygen. He was wearing high-waisted pants with rainbow suspenders. And, here's the good part, a T-shirt that said, "Drink Til You Want Me." Love it! I wish I could have taken a photo!

My sister's surgery went well, and she's starting to feel better. She's still got a hard row to hoe, so if you could keep her in your prayers that would be great!

I still need to schedule Sage's surgery. She's stressed out about it, so I think it would be best to just get it over with.

Kaywinnet, the dog, is doing pretty well after her major abdominal surgery. She's still in a cone, and on 4 different medications, but she should be OK.

I'm having a really crummy fibro flare. It feels like there is gravel in my shoulders and hips. But, I'm not gonna complain because it will go away and life is good :-)

Are you all ready for Thanksgiving?

What a day!

2008-11-19T06:41:00.003-07:00

Sorry I haven't blogged in a little bit, I ran out of town last week on the train (awesome way to travel!) and I've been in Iowa helping my sister through some bad stuff. Not the least of which was a surgery to remove her gall bladder yesterday.

The surgery went well, but they were having a hard time getting her pain under control afterward. She's on some pretty serious painkillers every day after a series of botched surgeries in the military, so the stuff they were giving her just wasn't helping. And they were insisting that nothing else could be done, and that Julie just needed to relax. I'm a big believer in relaxing and breathing and all that, but there's a point where that's just not going to help, and Julie was long past it.

I turned into the Nurse's Nightmare, and pretty soon they had a cocktail that knocked the pain down a little, and allowed her to sleep. Then I just needed to make sure they were getting them on board on time all day, but they were really good about that. I wasn't quite as bad as this scene, but I was ready to go here if needed. (That part of the movie always makes me cry.)

Then, in the midst of dealing with all this, we got word back from Sage's biopsy. Her growth was the kind of birthmark I'd suspected, and he recommends surgery. The good thing is that there's no cancer in it right now, thank God! So, I'm at the hospital dealing with two sets of surgeons all day...

To add to all that, Davin called to tell me that the reason the dog keeps throwing up is that there's something metal obstructing her intestines and she needs immediate...wait for it... yep, surgery! It turns out she'd eaten a jingle bell AND a magnet and not only was her intestine obstructed, it was perforated. They expect her to be OK, it looks like we caught it right in time.

So, I need to set a surgery on the calendar today for Sage, and go get Julie from the hospital. And, Davin's picking up Kaywinnet from the vet.

So, it's all good, but it's all overwhelming, too. I need a minute to have a nervous breakdown, then I'll get back on track!

Stephen Fry, "The Letter"

2008-11-11T00:37:00.003-07:00

This is long, but it always cracks me up. It's a lovely blend of puns and absurdity, wrapped into a vampire story. What more could you want?

Catching up

2008-11-10T11:45:00.007-07:00

First of all, today is the Marine Corps Birthday. Happy Birthday!

Sage's head seems OK today, there was no bleeding or weird stuff over the weekend. Now we just settle in and wait for the results.

The kids and I watched Squirm, a 1976 horror film about man-eating earthworms. I'm trying to figure out how I can count that for school.

We went for a drive up in the mountains yesterday. It's dingdang cold up there! We were up over 10,000 ft for a while, and it might as well be January when you're that far up. I'll stick with town and wait a little longer for winter.

Don't forget to come find me on Facebook if you do that sort of thing: Jen Lindner-Green :-)

Look who I ran into this weekend!

It's not really Johnny Depp, but MAN he was good! He even had the swishy walk and the accent. I wanted to snatch him up and bring him home, you know, to play Monopoly with or something. I'm a good girl! And, more importantly, I'm an oooooold girl...

Happy Monday!

Biopsy

2008-11-07T11:46:00.003-07:00

Not something you normally expect for your 10 year old, but we're rolling with it.

When Maya and Sage were born, we were able to tell them apart because of a birthmark Sage has on her scalp. It was flat, and a little bumpy, and no hair grew in that area. So, even in the dark, we'd know which baby we had.

Once her hair covered it, we never thought about it again. Until last month when it changed. It stayed the same size around, but started bulging out all over the place. Plus, it became crusty and oozy.

We took her to the pediatrician, who immediately announced that he had no idea what it was, and sent us to a dermatologist. But, even though he didn't know, he gave me some good medical search terms, and I was able to find out what it likely was.

This was confirmed by the dermatologist today. It's most likely a nevus sebaceous. This birthmark can change during adolescence (ta da!) and can sometimes become malignant (boo!), but that having it go bad is rare.

So, the dermatologist took a biopsy today. If it is a nevus sebaceous, we will likely have surgery to remove it because there's a risk that basal cell carcinomas can form within it. Even if that's the case, there's no concern on the dermatologist's part that the growth is cancerous now, and it doesn't usually become that way before the patient's 20s.

So, really, even though it sounds kind of creepy, it's all good. We'll know well ahead of time if anything's going to be a problem, and if she does need to have it removed it will be an hour or so under local anesthetic, then straight home. No biggie.

We should know in 2 weeks what's going to happen next.

Facebook

2008-11-06T17:01:00.004-07:00

I am probably the last person in the free world to get onto Facebook, but I'm on there now! You can find me if you know my real name (which you should by now, it's Jen Lindner-Green.) If you're on there, come find me! Just tell me who you are because I may only know your blog name.

My very first friend over there is my awesome guy in London, Mark Tingley, whom I've known since the early 90s when he found me sleeping on a park bench on the Pearl Street Mall.

Then, somehow magically, it keeps finding people I know on there to catch up with. It's kind of spooky, actually. If they can sort out that I knew this particular person from across town or friend from 15 years ago, how come we can't find Osama bin Laden? I'm serious.

And, it's way less full of emo angst AND easier to sort out than myspace.

Don't worry, I'll still be around here as much as I can, but I'm having a blast finding folks I haven't seen in ages!

I made myself some slippers,

2008-11-05T14:21:00.001-07:00

right in tine for the cool weather! For a while there I was wondering if fall was ever going to come.

I crocheted them over a couple of evenings, and just sort of made it up as I went along. Well, I mean, I did that on the first one, the second I just tried to do the same as the first.

They're a little big around, but they stay on and keep my feet warm. Yay!

Pharmaceutical Thoughts/Life Changes

2008-11-04T11:34:00.006-07:00

Remember when you were in college and you took acid with your friends, and you would write down all the stuff you said because it just seemed so BRILLIANT at the time? Of course, then you had to deal with a house full of sticky notes the next day that purported to explain the functionings of time, or wondering if that stuff you saw was always there and the dose just gave you the power to see it? Yeah, brilliant, ahem...

Well, it's been a long, long time since those days, which is good. I feel like I have such a tenuous hold on my brainpower as it is since bearing children, that it's just not worth risking coming completely untethered for the sake of this form of temporary, fake enlightenment. Gotta admit, those were fun days, though!

No reason for bringing that up, except that I have a migraine and the meds are trying to work. I love my meds. I love my doctors. The world is a better place for me because of them. It does sort of weird me out though, that I'm still pumping drugs into my body to mess with my head after 20 years, the only difference being that they're just not as entertaining. Could this be what it means to grow up? To be old?

Ooh, it just occurred to me that, since the early 90s, I went from LSD to LDS. Hmmm. If I could get in a time machine now and go back and talk to myself then, I don't think the then me would believe it. Then me would be all like, "Strange things are afoot at the Circle K." And I'm pretty sure the rest of the message would be lost. Glad to be where I am, but still not sure how I got here...

Dia de los Muertos

2008-11-02T21:00:00.001-07:00

Did you do anything special for the Day of the Dead?

I didn't. I mostly ate more candy, and left church early with a migraine (it shouldn't be, but I'm starting to wonder if this is related.) This was extra bad, because today was also Fast Sunday, and I obviously wasn't fasting :-/

So, even if I had been celebrating, it would have ended badly. Trust me, if there were any sugar skulls around here today, I would have just sucked THEM right into my face alongside the leftover candy, and that would have been a waste.

I did enjoy that extra hour, though!

Hurl!

2008-11-01T15:53:00.002-06:00

Well, I didn't bother with a costume yesterday, but today I'm going as this:

Oh man, I need to get away from the candy!!!!!

Vampire Math

2008-10-31T10:37:00.004-06:00

Debunking vampires? Is nothing sacred?

This morning, I heard on the radio that vampires can't truly exist, because they would consume their food source (us) too quickly. I just had to look this little tidbit up:

Efthimiou's debunking logic goes like this: On Jan. 1, 1600, the human population was 536,870,911. If the first vampire came into existence that day and bit one person a month, there would have been two vampires by Feb. 1, 1600. A month later there would have been four, and so on. In just two-and-a-half years the original human population would all have become vampires with nobody left to feed on, even if our entire species doubled each month.

I've actually questioned the predatory habits of zombies, vampires and werewolves in this very blog before, so it is something I've spent time thinking about. Still, though, seeing that someone did the math and all is kind of depressing to me.

There's still hope, though. If real life vampires are like the ones in the works of Anne Rice, they could still be out there skulking around. In her works, the vampires could feed on an unlimited number of people, and they would only turn the ones they wanted to into vampires. They really considered this choice carefully, since they'd be spending a lot of time with that person from that point on. Also, they weighed out how many vampires could live in one area without arousing suspicion, so it didn't happen very often. Hmmm, I guess Anne spent some time thinking about this, too!

Or, if you look at the vampire legends on wikipedia, many cultures believe that becoming a vampire has nothing to do with being bitten by another vampire in the first place:

The causes of vampiric generation were many and varied in original folklore. In Slavic and Chinese traditions, any corpse which was jumped over by an animal, particularly a dog or a cat, was feared to become one of the undead. A body with a wound which had not been treated with boiling water was also at risk. In Russian folklore, vampires were said to have once been witches or people who had rebelled against the Church while they were alive.

So, really, it's possible that IF there are vampires out there, they aren't reproducing in an out of control fashion. They could still be around!

There, I feel better now! Sort of! I do still wonder about the zombies, though...

Happy Halloween!

Need the escape hatch!

2008-10-30T21:07:00.008-06:00

I spent this morning in court (nothing dealing with me or my family, we're all good) and it was a pretty stressful circumstance. It all turned out well, though, which goes a long way, whew!

Anyway, I was looking for something to cheer me up, AND I got an email from an old friend asking me what's up with my (lack of) blogging. She is one of the friends I've had the longest, so she's pretty important to me. I met her in 7th grade, you know, when life sucked hard all day every day! Now she's working in the Philipines, so I'm living vicariously through her, since I'm never going to get my big butt much past the Yucatan, and I fear that was a one-shot deal.

Those of you who follow my blog will be glad to know that this is the same friend that I attended sci fi cons with in #9 of my Geek 13.

So, to kill two birds with one stone, I'm posting this scene from a movie that she and I watched about 600 times together back in the day. This scene always makes me happy (as does the next one where he sings solo for Penny Priddy) and it did the job for me again today. I hope it has the same effect on her, and on you all. This is one of the best movies ever, and you should go rent it right away if you haven't seen it. Heck, even the end credits are awesome!

This one's for you, Fris!

Happy Halloween tomorrow. What are you going as? I'm going as a harried mother of 4 who's not getting enough sleep...

Somebody call Geordi LaForge!

2008-10-21T10:34:00.006-06:00

I think there's been an anomaly in the space-time continuum!

Somehow, even though no time has passed, and I haven't aged at all, Anya has gone from this:

To this!

Happy 13th Birthday, my super-preemie Anya Marie! We love you XOXOXOX I'm going to go throw up now...

(Stay tuned, more updates coming!)

Camping

2008-08-29T08:24:00.003-06:00

I've even left the house semi-clean this time! So, if you're going to break in, just sweep and mop the kitchen, and clean up any messes you make while you're here...

Oh, and clear out by Monday, when we'll be getting back.

Uh oh...

2008-08-27T15:23:00.003-06:00

This weekend, I was trying to whisper something into Maya's ear (she's one of the 10 year olds) and she whipped her head around to give me her other ear. I asked if there was something wrong with the first one and she said, "Oh yeah, that one doesn't work any more..."

What? When did this happen? She said she thinks it happened when she she was 4 or so, and watching Teletubbies on the couch. That's SIX YEARS ago!

I took this opportunity to remind all of the kids that if a body part of theirs quits working, they should tell one of us about it right away. (Sometimes I can not believe the stuff I have to tell my children.)

The pediatrician said that it isn't earwax or a fluid buildup, and recommended that we see an audiologist. He refused to speculate about what might be going wrong...so like any good mom I looked it up on the internet.

It's unlikely it's in infection, because the tympanogram was fine, and everything looked good (that's still what I'm hoping for, though.)

This is one of the times where having identical twins is cool! There are a host of genetic abnormalities that could cause long term hearing loss, but we have a perfect control subject who doesn't have any of those issues. Also, they've pretty much had the same courses of meds (no ototoxic ones) and have been exposed the same environment. I can't think of an accident or injury that Maya's had that would affect her hearing, but it's possible.

So, I'm back to hoping it's an infection, although that's already pretty much been ruled out...

Any ideas? We should be setting up the appointment with the audiologist tomorrow.

Another post from the radio.

2008-08-26T18:47:00.004-06:00

Sorry, we've been driving all over, so I've been listening to the radio a lot...

From Eric Clapton's Bell Bottom Blues:

"And if I could choose a place to die
It would be in your arms."

What?! Please don't! I'm sure he meant it to be romantic, but can you imagine a WORSE thing to wake up to? What was he thinking?

If I wrote it, it would go like this:

"And if I could choose a place to die
It would be in a hospital or other institutional setting so that you will be spared the clean up..."

Subsequent verses would explain how he would have updated his will recently and that accessing the life insurance policy should be no problem. Also, that he fixed up the house so there shouldn't be any major repairs in the first couple of years after his death.

Romance has its place, but I'm a practical gal.

I heard this on the radio...

2008-08-22T20:31:00.001-06:00

"Your mama don't dance, and your daddy don't rock n' roll."

How can they know that? Do they see me?

:-/

Monday, Monday,

2008-08-11T16:01:00.004-06:00

can't trust that day. Unless you were expecting it to be gray and sleepy, then it's pretty much on target.

Yesterday was fun. It was my birthday, w00t! I ended up subbing in Primary, with the 5 year olds. I told them it was my birthday, and asked them old how they thought I was turning. One kid had a look of awe on his face and said, "Twenty?" as if that was the biggest number he could think of. I said, "Aren't you sweet? I'm 38."

Seven little mouths dropped open. It was the only time the room was silent all day!

Ooh, creepy!

2008-08-09T15:30:00.003-06:00

If they ever do a full scale horror musical, I hope they choose Wade Robson as the choreographer!

This is from his new Cirque production (shown on the SYTYCD Finale):

Here's one of my favorites, from SYTYCD Season 2. I think they're zombies, but I'm not sure, and I don't care, it's nice and spooky!

He's actually done a bunch of stuff, but these "off" sorts of performances are my favorites.

Back!

2008-08-07T05:46:00.006-06:00

We went camping with our homeschool group. There were 10 families there (wow!), which translates into about 7 zillion kids and 5 or so dogs. We filled a lot of the campground, which made it feel very cozy and safe.

The kids ranged from 15 on down to 18 months, and they all got along pretty well. They're growing up, and it's bittersweet. Some of the kids have been in this group since it started, back in 2001, and it's weird to think they won't be kids forever.

And it was great to have so much grown up time! I didn't really know all of the other parents very well before the trip, and I really feel like I got a chance to connect with everyone. You end up getting a pretty good glimpse at someone's personality when you've spent a few days getting dirty and flooded out with them, and I was impressed with everyone who came.

And flood it did. The last night was a bit on the "dramatic" side, easily the worst rain we've ever camped in. We had a river running through our camper for about 15 minutes, until Davin saved the day by tossing a tarp over the side that was getting hammered. And the hail didn't help much, although the kids and I had a lot of fun loudly proclaiming, "What the hail is going on around here?" Try it, it's fun!

Some of the other folks, in tents especially, had a rough time. That was the worst part of the night, worrying about everyone else. We kept tabs on the other campers as best we could, just to make sure no one got washed away!

And, this morning, we needed another family's help just to tear down our camp. Something is wrong with one of the bed rails on the pop up, and it didn't want to slide in. There's no way to pull it if it's not popped down, so if the other family hadn't been there to help we'd be living in Central City now! We are so glad they were still there, whew!

I can't find my camera, so hopefully I will get some photos soon from other (read: more responsible) parents. Until then, just picture us in the sun, happy, and busy!

Gone Campin'

2008-08-03T11:55:00.001-06:00

See you on Wednesday!

Gasp! (Literally!)

2008-07-28T21:00:00.004-06:00

Guess what I saw in the road while I was out walking the other night?

A nasal cannula. How do you lose one of those on the side of the road? I hope they have a back up. I just have a horrible picture of someone's Grandpa whizzing around in a convertable and getting the cannula ripped clean off his face...although if he was driving fast enough, that might keep the oxygen rushing right up his nose until he could get home and hook back up, I suppose.

As a side note, Anya needed oxygen until she was 7 months old, most of that time by cannula. (Before that she had a CPAP, and before that she was on a ventilator with an ET tube.) So I'm pretty familiar with all this breathing apparatus stuff, and it was just extra weird to see one just laying there in the road.

It's rainshinin' here!

2008-07-24T16:54:00.003-06:00

It's raining so hard that I initially thought the kids were "watering" the windows with the hose. At the same time, the sun's shining down. What a mixed up day!

It took $72 worth of gas to fill up the minivan...

2008-07-21T21:50:00.001-06:00

...it would have been cheaper just to have it towed.

Plant sex is dragging me down! A migraine whine post. You may skip this...

2008-07-20T12:19:00.005-06:00

I mean, isn't that what pollen is, the reproduction method of plants? Well, it stinks! I understand that plants have to do that for us all to survive, but could they be more responsible in their sexual habits, and not sow their wild oats willy nilly into the wind? I really don't want to be involved in their baby plant making at all, if I can avoid it.

I have had a headache non-stop for weeks now from the pollen. Most of the time it's just a dull roar. But, from time to time it explodes into a migraine, and I've had a lot of those lately.

If a migraine was just a bad headache that you could get over in a bit, I think I'd be more OK with the process. But it's not. It's like a 2 to 3 day attack, and it wrecks you. Before anything else happens I get stupid, and words won't come. Sometimes I slur my speech and get clumsy. Unfortunately, sometimes in this part of the attack, I really am stupid and don't recognize that's what's happening. It's like someone has taken over my brain.

Then, the nausea, pain, and light and sound sensitivity can come out of nowhere (it seems like to me) and knock me flat. I never used to throw up with the migraines, but I started to in the last year. So, now I have medicine I can shoot up my nose, because if I take the other stuff and throw it up, I can end up in the ER. I'm glad to have the nasal spray, it's a little unpleasant, but the other alternative is a self-administered shot which I've done a lot, or the ER like I said. So this gives me a lot more control over my situation.

The meds I have are pretty awesome, and most of the time I'm not in bad shape painwise for more than 2-4 hours. Considering that there are folks out there who don't have access to meds, or can't find a protocol that works and end up down for days, that's really not bad. But, the meds have their own issues. Oftentimes, between the narcotic painkiller and the vasoconstrictor and just the relief of being out of pain, I can't sleep after an attack. So, what has already taken a day or more between the stupids and the pain, usually sucks up the next night which wrecks the next day. Not that I'm really back to normal by then anyway, but I can usually pass.

So, an attack can take anywhere up to 3 days to fully get over. And then, thanks to the plants, I'm usually working up to another one. This time of year, it's pretty common for me to have 2 migraines a week, and sometimes 3. It will get better in a little bit, but right now it sucks to have to carry my head around. I've asked if I can have it removed, but my neurologist doesn't seem to want to do that for me. (She's also poohpoohed my Matrix jack implant idea.) Sigh.

That's it, my whine is complete. Come back tomorrow and I'll try to post something less crabby :-)

Hmmmmmmm...

2008-07-17T17:32:00.005-06:00

Donor kidneys removed with single bellybutton cut

Brad Kaster donated a kidney to his father this week, and he barely has a scar to show for it.

The kidney was removed through a single incision in his bellybutton, a surgical procedure Cleveland Clinic doctors say will reduce recovery time and leave almost no scarring.

I don't know about this. I mean, I'm pretty sure a kidney could totally fit through my big nasty bellybutton, so that part's OK I guess.

But, I gotta be honest. If I am giving someone a kidney, the least I would want in return is a big gnarly scar.

I'd be showing that off to everyone at the drop of a hat. Sitting next to a stranger on the bus? I'd hike up my shirt and tell the whole gory story! Christmas morning with my great grandchildren? Heck yeah, I'll say, "Did I tell you the story about giving up my kidney back in Ought Eight?" and then I'll ignore them when they try to tell me I've told them a million times and show them my crepe-y grandma flesh. And heaven forbid I ever end up on a game show or something, although I'm sure Alex Trebek would be really polite about it.

Anyway, that's just me, I'm sure this would be great news for most folks...

Ooh, 'Pooky!

2008-07-16T09:31:00.002-06:00

That's retro twinspeak (from when they were 3 or 4) for "spooky."

Check this out, Stanley Hotel Historic Ghost Tours!

There's a really good article about the Stanley over at Wikipedia, if you recall, it was the inspiration for Stephen King's The Shining, which is one of my favorites.

Doesn't that look like fun? Let's all go!

Pee, Poop and Nerds, Oh My!

2008-07-14T10:07:00.003-06:00

We are a two dog house this week, as we have my MIL's dog, Scruffles while she's at a conference. I'm curious to see how Kaywinnet does, since she's such a mess normally. Just a word of advice, when the people at the shelter tell you a dog is prone to house soiling and destruction, and has been neglected most of her life, you should listen to them. Unless you really like cleaning stuff up, that is! She's a lot better than she used to be, but we can't be gone for long without her freaking out...

So, I'm wondering if having another dog around will help ease her lonliness when we're out. So far, I'm not seeing any improvement, because Scruffles is freaked out and peeing on stuff. Remind me again why we keep pets?

We're missing a co-op class today on The Underground Railroad, because Maya and Sage have some nasty tummy thing going on. It really sounded like a neat class, and I'm disappointed. But, not disappointed enough to get everyone else sick, or make the girls have to deal with that stuff in a public restroom, yuck!

I found this quiz over at Cube's Blog, and thought it was fun. I think I scored artifically high in some areas because we're homeschooling, though. I have pretty quick access to maps, globes, the periodic table, etc. And some of it seemed to be based on whether you read for pleasure or not, which doesn't seem all that nerdy to me, but maybe I'm not the best judge?

So much for that new direction!

2008-07-13T02:42:00.003-06:00

Sorry I've been absent. This walking training is like having a part time job, which is apparently what blogging used to be for me.

But, the walking is going well. Tonight I nearly walked out of my pants. I held them up and walked into WalMart and bought some smaller ones. So, I'm not apparently losing any weight, but something is coming off!

We have 2 new pets since I posted last, a cat named Kahless and a snow corn snake named Yuan-Ti. Yes, we're geeks, why do you ask?

I can't sleep tonight, so I thought I'd bug you all. What's up? How was the 4th? (Our city fireworks display caught fire, oops!) Anything exciting going on?

Back with a new direction!

2008-06-11T22:40:00.002-06:00

I had to take some time off from this blog because it was getting boring to me. Not that the blogging is boring, I just felt like all I ever did was write about being busy, what we did today, blah blah blah. While that can be an accurate view of my life, it's really just not very interesting if you're not in the middle of it!

So, while I was walking last night (6 miles!) I started thinking. I decided I was going to blog less about the blah blah blah of my life, and more about new things I'm learning, or the goings on of the world rather than just the Horde. Of course, if anything really cool happens here, I totally reserve the right to tell about it! But, when life here is blah blah blah field trip, blah blah blah pink eye, I want to have a back up.

Did that make any sense?

So, moving on...

Have you heard of neoteny? It's when adults of a species retain characteristics normally possessed by juveniles. For instance, many domesticated dogs resemble infant or even fetal wolves. There is some evidence to suggest that they are this way because we've chosen them for their "cute" qualities.

Many sources seem to consider humans to be neotenized apes, which is something to consider. Apparently we have a lot in common with fetal chimps, for instance. I'm not seeing a lot around here to indicate that humans are necessarily that much MORE developed than apes, that's for sure. Apparently we've wrecked the dogs, if nothing else!

This is the sort of stuff I think about when I'm walking. Well that and, "Why did I sign up to do this?" and "Man, I have to pee."

We won't be here much tomorrow, as it's Davin's birthday and we've got plans for almost the whole day.

See you soon!

Pretty much back to normal

2008-05-23T12:47:00.003-06:00

I spent yesterday washing sheets and towels, and throwing away make up. Oh, and putting in eye drops. 4 times a day you have to do that! I don't get to do anything 4 times a day.

But, the good news is that I think we're all back to normal. Or, normal for us.

Oh, I spent a lot of time surfing around youtube. This isn't the world's most appropriate video, but it cracked me up and that says a lot considering the day I had yesterday. I'm just trying to imagine the world where this guy is a rock star.

Renee, this is different than the one I put on the board.

A good thing that happened yesterday was that my favorite guilty pleasure TV show started it's 4th season last night. I love that show!

Better run, we're off to a field trip! Catch you up later...

Pink Eyed Mama!

2008-05-21T16:27:00.002-06:00

Oh yay, I've got it, too!

And the doc says it's likely viral, which means we're contagious even though we are on the drops.

Editing to add: I don't think they should call it pink eye, that sounds tame and kind of cute. I think they should call it something along the lines of "gritty ball of fire eye."

Quarantine

2008-05-20T15:39:00.000-06:00

We've got PINK EYE. Ooooo, stay away...

Yo Yo Down

2008-05-19T11:02:00.003-06:00

I've gained and lost the same 50ish pounds a few times since 1999. Right now I'm on an upswing, and it's really bothering me.

I don't care so much about how I look, really I don't care how anyone looks. But, I do care that my clothes don't fit, and I feel the excess weight is exacerbating my fibro symptoms. Also, it's just a bunch of extra me I'll be hauling for 30 miles when I do my Challenge Walk.

So, I've decided to try to lose some weight before I go. I started about a month ago, and I've lost 14 pounds so far. There's a LOT to go, but I feel good that I'm going in the right direction :-)

To do that, I've had to cut my calories drastically (darn metabolism) even with all the walking I'm doing. And, since our trip to Iowa, I'm back on the Diet Coke and I don't even care! When you're playing with 1000-1200 calories a day, a can (or more) of 0 calorie frosty goodness is awfully appealing.

Anyway, that's what's up, or down I guess, with me...

Not Dead! (Well, some of the kids are undead.)

2008-05-16T17:07:00.006-06:00

I'm not dead!

You know you've been neglecting your blog when your dad calls to check if you're still alive. At least he didn't call the local police and send them out for a welfare check, although that would have been blogworthy!

I've been busy here and there. My big news today is that I've walked 100 miles in training for my MS Challenge Walk in October. Go donate money if you want to help out :-)

Of course, 100 miles doesn't seem like a lot when I think of all the miles my brother probably RAN in boot camp, but I'm still excited.

Speaking of, he graduated! He's a full-fledged U.S. Marine. Isn't he handsome?

And here is a photo of the homeschool project I was talking about earlier. The kids all dressed up and gave speeches as if they were famous people from history. Of course, they played a little fast and loose with it here and there, as you can tell from Blackbeard's light saber.

From left to right, and in order of time period: Cleopatra, Boudicca, Queen Zenobia, Mulan, Joan of Arc, Blackbeard, Susan B. Anthony, Juliette Low, Laura Ingalls Wilder, Frederick Libbey, Christopher Robin Milne and Andy Warhol. (Mine were Cleopatra (Maya), Joan of Arc (Sage) and Susan B. Anthony (Anya).

Afterwards, Anya (Susan B. Anthony) asked if she could be someone with a weapon next time, because her "Votes for Women" picket sign was of little use against Blackbeard and Joan of Arc when the speeches were over and the kids went out to goof off.

Finally, she and her special friend Sam (ie Andy Warhol) reverted to being zombies in an attempt to thwart their armed colleagues.

Yep, homeschooling at its best.

Coming up for air!

2008-04-20T18:50:00.002-06:00

This week we've been getting ready for a new co-op session (there were over 70 classes offered this time, which is incredible!) and finishing up with the last session.

In our group, co-op works like an education potluck. Everyone brings something to the table, a class, field trip, party, etc, and then they all get to join in the feast. So, there's a ton of opportunities out there for my kids that aren't necessarily something I could teach them or do for them myself.

For instance, tomorrow, there will be 15 kids dressed as famous people throughout the ages. They will give us a speech as their person, so there's a lot to prepare for. I had to get 3 of mine ready to talk. I now know more than I ever expected to know about Cleopatra, Joan of Arc and Susan B. Anthony! I'll post pictures after it's all over.

So tonight, I have to read through the zillion classes, compare them with my needs and my schedule, and get ready to sign up tomorrow. Whew!

Hopefully I'll be back in here in Tuesday with a little more time on my hands!

Those Were the Days

2008-04-16T06:01:00.005-06:00

What does this make you think of?

This reminds me of my crazy friends from high school. We were never as co-ordinated as these girls, but we used to do goofy stuff like this all the time.

Did you have friends like that, friends you'd go anywhere or do anything with? Once, we drove around downtown stripped down to our bras and underwear with our phone numbers written on the back windows of the car. We broke into an acquaintance's house at night to hide Easter Eggs, and into another's to wish her a happy birthday at midnight (we wanted to be the first!) And more. Nothing was too far, too loud, or too wild when we were together.

My only excuse for this behavior is, "Seemed like a good idea at the time."

I don't do stuff like that any more. Part of my problem is that I'm 37 now, and far too practical. Also, I wouldn't be caught dead in public in my bra and underwear (and not just for modesty reasons, ugh I gotta keep the works covered up these days!) I still have a ton of friends and a ton of fun, just not the same way I used to.

I don't know who these girls are (here's their myspace), but I'm glad for this excuse to meander down memory lane!

70 miles!

2008-04-14T22:07:00.003-06:00

I've walked *~*70 miles*~* so far in preparation for my MS Challenge Walk in October. Woohoo!

I'm 34% of the way to the my financial goal of $1500. A big thanks to everyone who's donated! If you want to join them, you can click here and lend a hand. As you all know, my mom has MS, and it's a horrible disease. Hopefully, if we all work together, we can find a cure!

I still have six months to get ready, and it's starting to feel real. I think I'm gonna make it!

Still looking for recommendations for books on tape. Right now I'm walking my way through Stephen King's Bag of Bones. I've been downloading books from Audible.com, which is a pretty good deal. My membership allows a new one every month, which is right about my speed for going through them, given that I listen to music some of the time, too.

Wow, 70 miles. That seems really far to me!

Loosy Goosy

2008-04-12T09:32:00.004-06:00

You may recall that all of my kids have loose valves in their digestive system. This means that they throw up shockingly easily. Not just when they're sick or confronted with something disgusting, you sort of expect that. We get involuntary uploads if they're running around too much, crying hard, or even if they get excited about something.

"Hey kids, we're going to Disneyland!" we might say.

"Really?" they'd answer, "Wheeeeeee-yarkle YARP YARP!"

Here's an example from last night at the dinner table. We were eating spaghetti and goofing around, and we all got to laughing. Suddenly, Tiernan started to sputter between giggles. That's no problem at Casa de Horde!

He simply excused himself from the table saying, "Uh oh, I'd better go laugh over the toilet."

I wonder when the fraternities will start calling to recruit him?

I'm Psychic! And it doesn't matter!

2008-04-11T00:08:00.009-06:00

Tonight, I was sitting at dinner, and this random thought just popped into my head: "You know who we never hear about any more? The Harlem Globetrotters."

Can't you just hear that theme song being whistled in your head, right now as you read this?

Anyways.

So, we come home, I flip on the TV, and guess who's out on tour? Of course, the Harlem Globetrotters! They must have been beaming signals straight into my head, just so I'd be ready when the tickets went on sale.

Fat lot of good it did them, all that direct brain contact with me, because the closest they're coming to my house is OKLAHOMA CITY! That's a long way to drive considering I bet Meadowlark Lemon isn't even still on the team.

(He's not, I checked. He's 75 now.)

My point? Don't really have one. But, I'm not wearing my aluminum foil headgear (or saran wrap bra) right at the moment, so if you want to beam something into my head, feel free. But it darn well better be information I can use, and not about an event going on 700 miles from my house.

I love the smell of fear in the morning!

2008-04-08T03:32:00.001-06:00

You probably wonder what I'm doing up at 3:30 in the morning. Actually, if you've been reading here long, you probably don't.

But, today is different. I was well on my way to a full night's sleep not long ago. I'd even taken one of my Rozerems, an awesome sleeping pill that I'd misplaced until recently (Only Users Lose Drugs). I was tucked in good and proper and nearly comatose when I was scared more than half to death. Probably closer to three-quarters or seven-eighths to death.

Why?

Because, quietly at first, then growing louder, our piano started to play itself. Up and down the scale, over and over.

My reaction will show how truly unliberated I am, and that I'm a coward to boot. I whacked Davin and demanded that he get up and investigate.

Davin found his glasses, and bravely ran off to confront the burglar or ghost or whatever it was. I mostly laid in bed hyperventilating, trying hard not to pee while listening for him to be killed.

He sorted out the problem right away. It was Maya's cat Tigger, walking up and down the keys. He has no doubt been saving up this bit of revenge ever since the hat incident. Serves me right.

Long story short (too late) I'm up now, fully awake and ready for the day. Nothing gets the blood pumping like an early morning freak out, good grief!

Old Guys on the Block

2008-04-07T15:29:00.008-06:00

Weird, I can see *some* of the guys wanting to get back together, but doesn't Donnie Wahlberg have enough to do these days?

Boy band New Kids on the Block to reunite

They may be pushing 40, but the New Kids are returning to the block.

The boy band New Kids on the Block, which sold 70 million albums in the 1980s and early ’90s, has reunited and plans to release a new album and go on tour. The reunion comes 20 years after the release of the group’s multiplatinum album, "Hanging Tough."

Maybe their lives just aren't the same without 12 year old girls screeching at them day and night?

It seemed like this song was always playing in the background during high school.

I gotta stop, this is just making me feel old.

Can't blog...

2008-04-04T19:26:00.003-06:00

waiting for Battlestar Galactica to start.

To help you pass the time today, I refer you to this article that speculates on who the 12th Cylon could be: We're checking our toaster list, we're checking it twice... I must confess that I have no frakking idea. After last season's "All Along the Watchtower" finale, I can't imagine what's coming next.

Also, if you haven't already, you can scroll down and take my art history quiz!

Art Deco, Art Nouveau, or Cheese?

2008-04-03T16:53:00.006-06:00

Today, we went with our homeschool group to see the Art Deco exhibit at the Aurora History Museum. Before hand, I showed them many examples of Art Deco pieces, and used Art Nouveau work to contrast it.

When we got home, I put together a photo quiz for them, and I thought you all might like to see it, too.

Get your #2 pencils, grab some paper, and click here to take the quiz Art Deco, Art Nouveau, or Cheese?

For those of you who need a review, here are some definitions from Wikipedia:

Art Deco: The structure of art deco is based on mathematical geometric shapes. It was widely considered to be an eclectic form of elegant and stylish modernism, being influenced by a variety of sources. Among them were the, so called, "primitive" arts of Africa, Ancient Egypt, and Aztec Mexico, as well as Machine Age or streamline technology such as modern aviation, electric lighting, the radio, the ocean liner and the skyscraper...Other popular themes in art deco were trapezoidal, zigzagged, geometric, and jumbled shapes, which can be seen in many early pieces.

Art Nouveau: Dynamic, undulating, and flowing, with curved 'whiplash' lines of syncopated rhythm, characterized much of Art Nouveau. Another feature is the use of hyperbolas and parabolas in windows, arches, and doors. Conventional moldings seem to spring to life and 'grow' into plant-derived forms. Like most design styles, Art Nouveau sought to harmonize its forms.

Cheese: Cheese is a food made from the milk of cows, goats, sheep and other mammals, by coagulating the milk. This is accomplished by first acidifying it with a bacterial culture and then employing the enzyme rennet (or rennet substitutes) to coagulate the milk to "curds and whey."[1] The precise bacteria and processing of the curds play a role in defining the texture and flavor of most cheeses. Some cheeses also feature molds, either on the outer rind (similar to a fruit peel) or throughout.

Or, here's a quick way to cheat. If a piece is linear, geometric, and dramatic, or reminds you of flappers or ancient Egypt, it's a good bet it's Art Deco. If it's organic, flowing, flowery and looks like something you might find at Rivendell, it's probably Art Nouveau. If you look at it and think, "Mmmm, that would be good with crackers!" put down Cheese.

The answers will be in the comments, so you can check your own papers. Let me know how you did!

Extreme Ironing

2008-04-01T20:41:00.004-06:00

Who knew ironing was so thrilling? Maybe if someone advocates Extreme Kitchen Cleaning, I'll get my dishes under control.

It's Snailing!

2008-03-31T18:57:00.002-06:00

It's snowing and hailing, so the kids have decided it's "snailing."

Are you guys all geared up for the new season of Battlestar Galactica? If you're not, it looks like the SciFi channel is running it 24/7 this week. I'm exciting, I hope they find Earth!

I've been helping out with a new local homeschooling wiki, it's called Hands On Homeschooling, and it's pretty interesting. The woman who created it has some neat ideas, and the site has lots of local contributors so I hope it catches on. I'm learning how to edit her pages so that I can add museums, etc, to her listings.

My book discussion went well. I'm thinking of doing another one next co-op, but I'm not sure which book to choose. The book doesn't have to be recent (in fact, it's kind of better if it's not, so folks can get it at the library), I just want it to be interesting and influencial in some way. Do you have any suggestions? I was considering Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, because I've always thought it was hilarious, but I'm not sure it's a book I want to make other people read. I think that's one you have to come to yourself... Any ideas for me?

Congratulations, we made it! That's one less Monday between us and the End of Days, whew.

Happy Friday!

2008-03-28T00:23:00.009-06:00

I've been away for a bit. So, it will be a longish post while I catch you all up.

First of all, I just have to say YAY about the newly announced X-Files sequel.

OK, back to my life.

We're over being sick, but it took far longer than I was expecting. I think the government should move their top-secret biochemical warfare labratories to Iowa, because they've obviously got some natural leg up in the supervirus production department. I can't remember the last time I've been so miserable! Even after the symptoms were gone, it sort of felt like the life had been sucked out of us for a while, hence no posts. Sorry about that, I did think about you all a lot!

Today we toured the Edgar Mine, up in Idaho Springs. It was great! I'm glad I was there with a group of friends, though, because I gave myself the giggles a few times. I just can't seem to take anything seriously, I'm such a juvenile. Stuff like when the tour guide was explaining how the ore was taken from the mine and sent to a "smelter," and I just knew there had to be a joke in there involving a "dealt-er" but I couldn't find it. I slay myself.

The other interesting thing that happened was that I think I had a panic attack. I mean, I definitely had a horrible panic moment, I just don't know if it would qualify as an attack or not. I've never felt like that before. During part of the tour I nearly lost control of myself. We were in a "refuge chamber," an area where the miners would gather behind a metal door if there were some sort of disaster in the mine. I was doing fine, cracking myself up with jokes like always, when suddenly I just HAD TO GET OUT! RIGHT NOW!

It is hard for me to understand, because on the one hand I wasn't worried about anything REAL, I knew there was plenty of air, I knew the mine wasn't going to collapse, I knew in my heart I was safe. But, at the same time, I felt a nearly paralyzing sense of fear. I started to tear up, and I couldn't catch my breath. I felt that if I couldn't calm down, there was a pretty good chance that I was going throw up and then make a run for it. It was as if I had two minds, one was rational, and one felt like I was going to literally die if I didn't do something. When the tour guide lifted the door I was fine again, in the space of seconds. What does all that add up to?

I have to say that I've been in lots of enclosed areas like this, including two other mines (Lackawanna and Argo) in the last few years with no ill effects. Weird.

Enough of that!

We've been learning American Sign Language for the last couple of weeks. That's been fascinating. If you've never looked into it, you should! Since it's relatively new, it does away with a lot of the hassles of other languages you might learn. Forming tenses is quite simple, and much of it is intuitive, so it tends to stick pretty well, even for the kids.

Of course, Tiernan, who has a few issues with appropriateness in elimination, has decided that he needs to learn how to say, "I would like to pee and poop in your toilet, which I will then drink out of." He'll have LOADS of friends in the deaf community, you can tell.

Oddly enough though, I can't seem to find how to say things like "pee" and "poop" in ASL. I finally found a sign for "toilet," but that doesn't allow me to convey the depth and subtlety of the process. Perhaps deaf people are just far more polite than my family? I supposed that's a given.

And, I can't wrap up the week thus far without letting you all know that my debit card was hacked and over $400 was taken from my account. No word yet on whether it will be put back, but I'm not holding my breath. You know, with a debit card, they can only get out however much money you have in your account, which 75% of the time would be a big fat zero. So, we've been victimized by the luckiest thieves ever, who happened to hit right after pay day. Figures.

Tomorrow I will be leading a discussion of the book One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest for some of the adults in my homeschool group's co-op. If you've read the book and you're in Denver, email me and you can come hang out with us! Unless you're some kind of perverted axe murderer, that is. I've had quite enough drama this week.

Hats Off

2008-03-19T20:44:00.001-06:00

Arthur C. Clarke Died Today

Apparently, I was mistaken

2008-03-18T03:44:00.004-06:00

I don't know what's up with this killer virus we picked up in Iowa, but we can't seem to kick it. I thought it was gone, but now we're in another round of fevers and coughing. We've got Pestilence here, if we can round up three more horsemen I think we can get the Apocalypse off the ground.

While I'm up tending the ill, I ran across this on Youtube. It's a recut of the Mary Poppins trailer, as if it were a horror film. Maybe it's the sleep-deprivation talking, but I thought this was pretty funny.

The other day, Cube asked if I'd named my laptop yet. I haven't, but I've already decided that to nerd it up properly, I need to get a bumper sticker for the outside that says, "186,000 miles/second. It's not just a good idea, it's the law." Whaddya think?