while my kids are playing at a friend's (woohoo, thanks, Sara!), but I'm not. I'm waiting for a call back from a global packaging service about why my package is not here.

Of course, they don't see it this way. Every time I call and explain to another person that my package is not here, but the tracking system says it was delivered on Thursday, they cheerfully tell me, "Ma'am? Our system shows that package was delivered on Thursday!" Um no, it wasn't. I was home all that day, and the door tag from the failed delivery attempt on Wednesday was still up. We stay at home moms may lead drab, repetitive lives, but they're not so boring that we need to call our delivery people and claim we didn't get our packages just to make the days go by more quickly.

Now they're telling me that they need to send the courier to my house to show me where he delivered the package. Am I the only one who sees a problem with this? Since I have checked my front door area carefully, I know that he's not going to drive up and miraculously pull the box from some previously unseen niche. Unless he's a magician and pulls it out of my ear...THAT I'd pay to see.

Given the evidence, odds are he delivered the package to the wrong house. It's unlikely he's going to show up at my house today and say, "Gosh darn it! No wonder it isn't here, I delivered it 2 doors up. I'm a complete idiot, I hope they fire me this time!"

Or, a more sinister possibility is that he's going to come to my house and kill me, so that I quit calling their claims line and complaining about him. There's plenty of room in those delivery trucks for a body, and heaven knows he has more than enough time on his hands since he's not actually DELIVERING any packages! I could be in a shallow grave by nightfall.

If I don't blog again by this time tomorrow, please consider running this lead down. I have it on good authority (after 5 phone calls I got the manager of my driver on the phone today) that the driver's name is "Gary."